Tuesday, May 15, 2012

Where to cling

Sarah preached on Sunday.  One thing she mentioned was disappointment.  She said she doesn’t hear disappointment preached about much.  I know why.  It’s because disappointment sucks.  Hope deferred… sucks.  Anyway, it was oh so practical and wonderful and heart-wrenching at the same time. 

I have been having a disappointing day once a month for a while because of you-know-what. 

That day came again yesterday for me.  My first reaction was to think up a new goal for the month: a house project, a writing goal, a craft...  Something I couldn’t do if I was pregnant… spray paint anyone?  I do this pretty much every month and it’s very helpful and I would highly recommend it… goals, that is.  Keeping active, that is. 

But as my mind raced, panicked, trying to cling to a new focus, grasp onto an excitement fix, to prevent cubicle crying (I was at work) - as I reached up to keep from tumbling down into a pit, grabbing at the edge, fingernails digging across the ground (dirt doesn’t make a good anchor) - I heard the Lord tell me (thanks to Sarah’s preaching) just to reach for Him... just to focus on Him. 

What should I do, Lord?  How can I cope?  How can I breathe? 

Just look to Jesus.  That’s it.  Just focus on Jesus.  No reasoning, no logic, no grasping, no distracting.  It’s all about Jesus.

Oh right, thanks Lord.


wonder wilks said...

You're too kind... i really cannot take any of the credit, it's all the Lord's grace as He gently leads me through my own hope deferred. i preached it hard to myself and then ran home & clung to my Father, the knower & healer of it all. praying for your tree of life to begin sprouting... :)

sarah richer said...

He does not dissappoint! He is faithful.

Anonymous said...

A great reminder. Thank you.

Melissa said...

I feel like there's a song about that....
Turn yours eyes upon Jesus
Look full in his wonderful face
And the things of Earth will grow strangely dim
In the light of His glory and grace.....