About a year ago, particularly in planning to return to work, thus turning me into a working mama, I began to feel weighed down. An easy transition for some was somewhat crushing pour moi. I guess the best way to describe it was a feeling of being trapped. My heart was torn, I started into despair, I felt like I couldn't handle all the roles and responsibilities on me, I felt a little bit like I was drowning.
Jesus told a parable of sowing seeds. A farmer spreads seeds in his field and the parable describes the various life journeys of those seeds. One such journey spoke to me at this time - some seeds grew among other plants (thorns, weeds) and got choked out, thus staying little, never growing up to maturity. This seed journey speaks about those who respond to God's Word but through cares, riches and pleasures, their lives crowd out His Word. Having given up my life for the Lord and having been on a maturing journey for a while, I hadn't personally related to these seeds before… until this point. I was comforted to identify a way to describe my feelings, my overwhelmingness, my trappedness. But not so comforted about the whole choking to death thing.
Jesus' intention in speaking this parable certainly wasn't to choke us to death. He was imparting wisdom for life so we could mature into spiritual men and women of God. This isn't a fate-filled horror story. Here's the real life promise - our destiny:
"Still other seed fell on fertile soil. This seed grew and produced a crop that was a hundred times as much as had been planted!
…And the seeds that fell on the good soil represent honest, good-hearted people who hear God’s word, cling to it, and patiently produce a huge harvest" (Luke 8:8,15).
I am free indeed, I certainly have a destiny in the Lord, I know that there is always a way out of any sort of trap or pit or tangent. That's grace. As we walk along our life journeys, small school turns to big school which turns to work, we move from home, we weave our lives into joined relationships, we buy cars, houses, stuff… we come across the planned, the unexpected, the fun, the hard…. But through it all we fix our eyes on Jesus, clinging to His Word, knowing our roots are growing deeper and deeper, knowing we are growing taller and taller, much higher than any cares.